Ode To The Flopper

Watch the ball player brought down to his knees
'Twas by contact, or for the referees?
See the tall man on the seat of his pants
Amid all the boos and ill-tempered chants

No mas!, came the call from the league's big brass
We think this acting is quite poorly passed
As a foul, a blatant breaking of rules
Do you think you can play us all for such fools?

Flopping and acting starting next season
Will give the NBA a very good reason
To review and decide in a flash
That you must fork over some cold and hard cash

(Of what doth this blogger write? Read it and weep: http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/news/story?id=3416579)

Top 10 Floppers
In honor of the NBA's decision to start fining players for the age-old practice of flopping, here is a top 10 list of the biggest floppers I've witnessed in the 25+ years I've been a fan:

10. Danny Ainge - If there was one thing fans could count on, it was that Ainge would wind up on the seat of his pants from minor or no contact almost every game. The bigger the game, the bigger the flops.

9. Larry Bird - Yes, the Bird Man was one of the greatest players to play the game, but the man had a penchant for the flop. He spent a lot of time on the ground for a Bird.

8. Sam Cassell - Over his 19 seasons with eight different teams, Cassell has steadily built a reputation for the flop. He might be the record holder for most flops in different uniforms!

7. Raja Bell - Why? Watch the video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNN9ZiH38fs

6. Robert Horry - He's one of only nine players in the history of the game to win seven or more NBA championships. While he's hit some pretty clutch shots to help his teams win those titles, he's also perfected the flop...especially while setting a pick.

5. Andrei Kirilenko - This modern-day flopper can be credited with bringing the flop issue to the forefront. During this season's playoffs, Kirilenko stole a game for his team with a classic flop against Houston. Check it out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hSaX7zNCMY

4. Dennis Rodman - Rebounding was Rodman's forte, but not far behind was his tendency to overreact to contact.

3. John Stockton - Mr. Assist seemed to need assistance getting up from supposed fouls a lot during his 19-year career.

2. Bill Laimbeer - This Pistons Bad Boy loved to rile a crowd, not to mention his opponents. If flopping was a fine art, this guy would have a shelf full of Academy Awards.

1. Vlade Divac - Growing up in Serbia did little to teach this big man to stay on his feet. What was that? It looked like Divac was fouled by Shaq's jersey! The proof:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgPHIT61FfU

(Dis)honorable mention:
Manu Ginobili, Steve Nash, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Shane Battier, Karl Malone, Matt Harpring, Kevin Johnson